Agent Washington (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
unrecovered) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
heyfreemagic2015-10-04 07:51 pm
unrecovered) wrote in heyfreemagic2015-10-04 07:51 pm
Magic Is Hard
[The best way to improve in a skill was training. Wash knew that. What he hadn't realized was that training went a lot more smoothly with someone who knew what they were doing in charge.]
[This probably explained why his attempts to practice magic in the park had been frustrating and fruitless for the past half hour. He had no experience in magic and no idea what to do - what he had was determination to master a weapon he'd need in order to fight, and a supply of patience that was beginning to run low.]
[His magic was different than most people's, he reasoned. He didn't have to start his own, like Casey, or use what was on hand, like Greg - no, his element was all around him all the time, and all he had to do was make it do what he wanted. Somehow.]
[Anyone who had been watching him for a bit may have seen sweeping and increasingly ridiculous arm motions - movements that might actually look cool if the wind was playing its part, but just came off as badly choreographed interpretive dance without it. Anyone who had been watching for quite a while may have witnessed him yelling at the sky about how one sweater-vested asshole could have at least provided a tutorial.]
[This probably explained why his attempts to practice magic in the park had been frustrating and fruitless for the past half hour. He had no experience in magic and no idea what to do - what he had was determination to master a weapon he'd need in order to fight, and a supply of patience that was beginning to run low.]
[His magic was different than most people's, he reasoned. He didn't have to start his own, like Casey, or use what was on hand, like Greg - no, his element was all around him all the time, and all he had to do was make it do what he wanted. Somehow.]
[Anyone who had been watching him for a bit may have seen sweeping and increasingly ridiculous arm motions - movements that might actually look cool if the wind was playing its part, but just came off as badly choreographed interpretive dance without it. Anyone who had been watching for quite a while may have witnessed him yelling at the sky about how one sweater-vested asshole could have at least provided a tutorial.]
no subject
Don't. Say that. Because the second you say that, something will happen, and I am not prepared to deal with that right now!
[He gets louder and higher pitched as he goes on, which is a default for Upset Wash. Hang out with the Reds and Blues long enough, and you learn to recognize narrative causality and how not to set it off. Though it looks like nothing's happening now - whether that's life cutting him a break or trying to make him look like more of a paranoid asshole than he knows he is already is still up for debate.]
[There's a beat or two of silence, in which things still don't happen and Wash realizes he's snapped at Greg for absolutely no reason. He sighs and slumps, defeated. Definitely paranoid asshole territory.]
I've only gotten it once, and that's when I panicked and thought we were all going to die, and that's not sustainable. I don't- [He pauses and shakes his head. That thought was going nowhere good. Time to switch gears.] How do you do it?
no subject
Usually, this would be the moment he insisted, yet again, that he didn't know, and more often than not it was just the same--accidental bursts during panic. That, however, was the last thing Wash needed to hear right now. He needed to think of something, for Wash's sake. ]
Well... I guess... uhh. [It was all well and good to want to give a good answer, but he had yet to put together anything useful.] I-I dunno. It hasn't happened a whole lot on purpose. But... [ He furrows his brow. If he considers that first time, in the bar, he can at least come to one conclusion. ] ...freaking out definitely wasn't the key.
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Yeah, I kind of figured.
Look, I- [He pauses, reconsiders] -it's not your fault I'm having a shitty time with this. I shouldn't have yelled at you.
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Let's think this through, all right? Magic's more about what's goin' on in your head than anything else, so we better get our heads on right.
no subject
[It's all Wash can do to keep a straight face, because bitter laughter is not the correct response to that statement. Still, if that's the case, no wonder he sucks at this.]
Okay?
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Magic's got its own sort of life to it, I think. Until you get a good feel for it, it's not gonna do what you want. [ He scratches his head.] Sorta like a pet? I guess? You gotta figure out if yours likes... I dunno, getting scratched behind the ears, or wet food.... or the, uh, mental... version of that... I went too far with this metaphor.
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Little bit, yeah.
[He takes a mental step back and tries to reason through what he's just heard.] So, I need to figure out how to use my magic before I can use it? [That's it. That's all he got.]
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[He still has nightmares about the cats.]
So, ummm. Uhhh. [You can practically see the gears grinding as he's trying to think of more useful advice.] We'd be better off focusing on why we want to use magic, than just trying to use it. I think.
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[Narrative causality is a bitch.]
I already have the why. It's the how that's giving me trouble. [He shakes his head.] Thanks anyway. I appreciate it.
[This is how you let people down gently without damaging their already fragile self-esteem, right?]
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Yeah. I haven't got my magic to work in ages, either, so all that's probably moot, anyway.
[He gives an awkward chuckle.]
Well, at least we can start keeping a list of what doesn't work and narrow it down, huh?
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[That couldn't be good. As Wash well knows, nonfunctional magic is a problem around here.]
How long is 'ages?'
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[Greg hasn't thought about it much that way. He certainly doesn't feel good about it being on the fritz, but it wasn't as if it had helped him last time he got in trouble..]
Since... you know.
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Oh.
Have you...tried...? [He gestures uselessly.]
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I dunno, man. Stuff just sorta happened before, yknow? I didn't get a ton of say in it. Maybe all that knocked the magic out of me.
[ He knows he shouldn't be hoping for that possibility, but... ]
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I don't think that's it - if it were, I wouldn't have mine either, and we both know that's not the case.
[Not that that's a great example. Plus, it's been a while since Wash died, and it's still relatively fresh for Greg, if that has anything to do with it...]
[At this point, it might be better for Wash to just admit he has no idea what the problem is, with either of them.]
I'd invite you to practice with me, but I'm not getting very far as it is. Still... [He shrugs. At least they can be out of their relative depths together?]
no subject
Greg stretches out his back, grunting. He's here, already. He might as well make the effort to look like he's doing something, even if it goes nowhere.]
Like I said. At least we can figure out what doesn't work.